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Fever Dreams

by Cloud Rat

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1.
March 01:10
I want a joy that never dies. But here, buried deep in snow, I still sit. Teaching myself to look at you with both eyes, and nothing else. So when I come home, My seesaw state of mind won't forever be picked apart. You’ll whisper: “Buried love is the best love.”
2.
C.S.R. 00:40
Gun-metal to the lobe, you take everything. With little discretion, you get an erection, From stripping people of the hope they wish you could give them. Your well kept facade is tearing at the seams. Your stench can be smelled all throughout the building. Counting coins as you kick her in the teeth. Racketeer by any name; Black market Ken Doll in the frontal position.
3.
Smoke Rings 01:08
To give up his body for the good of his species is all he knows. To plunder and put him in a submissive hold is why she floats. Domination is achieved by aggression; to torture and serve. Left unnourished and unwanted, you must work to grow. The greatest myth of all: Our workers are created by maternal manipulation. The harmonies of nature, the social classes of flowers. But the mighty systems are but tiny grains of sand.
4.
A guided finger on a school wall. Collected fragments I would see in the hall. Guided tribes of pre-adolescent monsters. You tell me I'm sexually perverted? It's a Lack of a line. What's abnormal? Distorted. skewed. Dead. Death. Fear. Acceptance.
5.
Incantations 01:24
Pissing blood, she smells like her bed. She casts little spells all over her body. Flicking the syringe, her jewel toned eyes look like a sea serpent's. Sedated and screaming, The chemicals in her mind form a perfect toxic cocktail. All she does is worry, Rocking back and forth. Lonely.Lonely.Lonely. "I feel it in me." She's like a hole: Dressed in shreds and scared to death. Take my blood and see whats wrong.
6.
Nest 01:22
His sweat smells like sweet sludge, And when he opens me, I break like tree bark. "To pierce," He said, "What beauty." To hurt the part of me that glowed. As his hand follows my curves, I choke back the vomit. When he ripped my skin, Tidy he placed the maggots on the wound, Only caring that I would heal properly. I laid back in anguish, and licked myself clean. Foot to brain.
7.
I turned to look at the oncoming traffic... Me and them, is there something I should look for? Razorblade backs couldn’t sting me enough. In this incredible deliverance, headlights; The Way. This ticking beetle in my throat made me cough blood. Mother time holds her arms so beautifully, Welcoming me into her throne. Take it away. Take me away.
8.
You like picking open sores. While the quietness of your home gives you a sense of completion. A life well spent, within your years. Liberation from a body; liberation from a cage. Never knowing, always wailing. The bile eeks its way out. The whispers are diminishing. You, falling, the curtains sway with every breath you take. The painful choices... And you think about how it is absolutely terrifying to be alone. But ready the stars, The last light and now the dark, ...Of the masks you wear in this world, I have one built called "Infinity."
9.
I hold my treasure deep within my hand, "Just look, o' sweet one." Bite sized with half shut eyes. Delicious, I begin to quiver. I feel my power, now full as a flooding ocean. I see the gaze of the shattered rocks biting at my feet. I bend down to console my cut body, As I feel the gloves come at me. The sweetness that is so subtle kisses away at my mind. This is the sorrow that lurks in my bliss. Breathe deep. Confusion takes me away. Breathe deep.
10.
This is the day you stray away from the other groups, And walk with it. Limp limbs, limp limbs. Hand it a drink and sit right next to it. Its thighs have always been your favorite. Appealing, its looks led it right to you. Fucked. This is what I don't like. That's what I LIKE. Payment, the initial act. The arching of the lower back. Decaying, it will always ache, But it will always get paid.
11.
Magnolias 01:34
Pent up aggression. Pent up, listen to me go on. Pent up whirlwind, sucking and spitting rotten fruit that he grew. A relationship that worm of a woman ate right through. Nothing comes to mind when they mention you. Hairpins, but nothing comes to mind. It was addiction fire burning up his time. Choices. Angelic demonic forces that manipulate your world. THIS IS NOT LOVE THIS IS ADDICTION. I don't love you anymore, I'm just comfortable and sore, so sore.
12.
Isolation; the feeling of an ant mindset. Too small, too small. Isolation; pretending to be someone I'm not. If I would have known I would feel like this, I wouldn't have hid or cared. Isolation; I won't leave this room. I won't leave. I sit in this multi-colored stall, Conveyor belt, smoked furnace. I'm chained to these words. I'm chained to my mind.
13.
Clear 01:45
Clear. She spends the day with a smile on her face. Pat on the head, the simplest reflection. Grant her some satisfaction. Everything she is, I want to be. Nothing in her mind, no sense to worry. All I ever wanted was to BE PAIN FREE. Digging a hole to sleep. Curling and twisting to sleep. Sweat and hair to sleep. Pain free.
14.
Powerlines 01:39
Conceived by wires, my birth was when they built the tower. Hidden message fed through everyone's words. Wires upon wires stay in flight like snakes, Wrap themselves around us. Power; energy is the god. GLASS MOVING STEEL. Obsolete. No flesh, no heart, no need. Programmed.
15.
Its cries were the root of our speech. What echoes still comes ringing back. Your feet keep running, But what's closed in strife will always entangle your heart.
16.
Fever Dreams 00:59
17.
Her clothes scattered like leaves, I watch her pounce from one side to the other. Cat purrs, and I watch her twist my body into position. Sliding silk, I pull and tug. Day 1: The Feast. Mouthing sadness, she one-by-one pulls of her first layer of skin. Never the right amount of beauty. Never the right amount of anti-everything. I want to love her with every inch of my being. She could eat my carcass alive. So much torment is part of the process, Becoming one of them. "My favorite activity is getting ready." She laughed. You are fucking invisible.
18.
Cracked skull, his eye twitches. Every ounce of paint thickens and dries. His centipede fingers curl around my back to make sure I’m still there, Educing me; enchanting me. Green eyes in the black light, strewn across his lop-sided bed. Awake to shakes, twitches, and he speaks; To wake up only in my dreams... Dying girl holds dead boy.

about

Tracks 1 - 7 originally from Three Way Split LP w/ Oily Menace and Wolbachia (2011, out of print).
Tracks 8 & 9 originally from Split 7" w/ Autarkeia (2011).
Tracks 10 - 18 originally from Split LP/Cassette w/ Xtra Vomit (2010 CS out of print / 2011 Vinyl)

credits

released September 29, 2011

Digital compilation released 2011 on Grindcore Karaoke
Cover art by Brennan Greaves - www.instagram.com/brennangreaves/
2015 Remaster by JC Griffin at Lakebottom Recording House in Toledo, OH - www.facebook.com/lakebottom/
Tracks 1 - 7 originally released on a three-way split LP with WOLBACHIA - wolbachia.bandcamp.com and THE OILY MENACE - theoilymenace.bandcamp.com
Recorded/Mixed/Mastered early 2011 by Kevin Kitchel, with Dylan Putnam-Smith assisting, at the Kitchel household in Lansing, MI.
Released via IFB Records & Black House (Our drummer bb Brandon's old label!)
Rasputin art put together by Joe Lachut and Nevin/IFB - www.graveyardshiftsp.com
Tracks 8 & 9 originally released on a split 7" with AUTARKEIA - autarkeia.bandcamp.com
Same recording sessions as previous tracks. Released via IFB Records.
Cover photo by Aysia Marshall - www.aysiamarshall.com
Tracks 10 - 18 originally released on a split cassette and then split LP with XTRA VOMIT - westmipunk.bandcamp.com/album/xtra-vomit-inebriation
Cassette released 2010 via Life Like and then LP released 2011 via IFB Records
Recorded/Mixed/Mastered again at Kitchel household by Kevin, tracks 10 - 15 in Summer 2010, 16 - 18 same sessions as tracks 1 - 9. Confusing, I know lol
CR was Madison/vocals, Rorik/guitars, Adrian/drums on these recordings.
Go Vegan // Be Queer // All Gods // No Masters

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Cloud Rat Michigan

Grindpunk band from Michigan. Hit us up at cloudratgrind@gmail.com

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